Ghosts of CHRISTmas Past

As I remember Christmas, I only remember the joys of sitting between a decorated, tinseled, pine scented real tree and a cardboard fireplace. The fireplace had a hearth of cardboard logs with a cellophane backing, and behind that sat a lit bulb, with a spinning windmill-like piece of metal on top. I would blow towards it and make the fire roar! We had red candles on top and Christmas cards, and we would tape our empty stockings on it too. It was duct taped to the door so that it wouldn't fall over, and the door was lined with masking tape (not very effective) to keep the cold out. I would set for hours in the chair next to the tree and just stare, stare at the lights and the shiny bulbs, and dream, dream of new toys and laughter. At night before I fell asleep, I would look outside to see if I could see that star the Christmas star. I could never just fall asleep, I wanted to see the man, the sleigh, the flying reindeer. I'd fall asleep eventually, but I'd be back up by 4 AM to wake up Mom. She'd be pissed and I would have to go back to bed and zombie out. Can I at least open my stocking? Can I open 1 present from my stocking? Can I eat a chocolate? Have an orange?

Nowadays, I don't have the same excitement and the magic, but I see it in my children's eyes and it brings me back. I still have a couple of decorations from those old days. Like the elves (see picture) that used to be on bottles of Joy dishwashing liquid, and my albino Rudolph doll. This year is the first one that I had to get rid of the ornaments that were on the old trees from Mom. They were beaten and scarred, but they were a part of me.

They looked like these -->

The presents I remembered most were usually one's I didn't have for very long, or wasn't allowed to play with. My mom had this thing about noisy toys, toys that needed batteries and toys used outside. They were for rainy days, or when we had batteries or could only use them in the yard. One year I got an electric dashboard. It had a winshield wiper, a horn, a key that would turn the engine over, a coin tray and turn indicators. It was yellow and had a plastic glass windshield. I could never play with it, because I had to use the horn and it took batteries, 2 strikes right there! And the batteries I'd get would have to last me until they leaked!

Another year I got a pedal go-cart that looked

like this ----->

I was only allowed to use it in the backyard. Well in Massachusetts, if you got an outside toy for Christmas, it would be late March or April, before you had a lawn! Then I had to pedal ot in the fricking grass!!!!! Not on the road, where we had three cars go by a day! not on a road that had a great hill! Not on a road that had a storage facility that had bumps at each garage level! I could have been Evel Knievel!!!! Damn!

When my brother came home from the War (Vietnam), it seemed like our Christmases got better! My sister Bernie bought us a crap load of stuff the year before, but it felt better that Joe was home! Well he got me this race car set. I guess on Christmas Eve he wanted to make sure that it worked, so he set it up and played with it. When I got it on Christmas I was elated! so after watching all the presents get opened up, i got a chance to put the booger together and the ^^%^^$%@^#&^#*^*# didn't work. It would only go in reverse! He broke my toy!

It looked like this, but went backward! ------->

I wonder what my children will remember.? I wonder what they connect with. This year my youngest is finding the truth about the fat man and I'm sure it is upsetting. I remember how I felt. It was like a loss. The magic was gone, just like that! I wanted to believe a fat guy could pop out of any home opening! What traditions will they carry. One day will they throw out my ornaments? Yes they will. It is a part of the progression of life. When our parents are gone, we either carry on or start new traditions. The ghosts of Christmas past live on inside us, carry us forward, remind us of the love and happiness we shared. With God giving us his most cherished possession, his son, he has shown us what really matters, love. Love for each other, family and ourselves. The gift of life we share is priceless. The memories that linger will never happen again, so their value is increased! May the love you have burst through this Christmas season. Go out of your way to open up the doors to your heart and remove them so that love can flow through! Step outside your shell and give, you reap two-fold for all you do! God Bless you and have a safe and joyful holiday! Love, Mike

Growing Older but not Up!

As time has been going by faster and faster, it is hard to say how much I've really matured. There are many things I'm constantly working on: Finishing my Master's program with an A+ average, cleaning my house slowly but surely, taking better care of my money and getting to even and decreasing my cursing. As I listed those, I unintentionally listed them by how I'm succeeding. Getting older has never interested me. I imagined by 47 I'd be working on one Master's (done that, onto #2), have my children succeeding in school (2 in college, 1 in gifted classes, 1 an A student and a jock), married (O for 2), planning retirement (just starting, so OK there), owning a house (O for 2) and beginning to travel (almost there). As you can see great successes, great failures. I've always given myself a grade of B+ as an athlete, teacher, student, Dad and person. I give myself a C- as a husband and a C- in finances. I don't own much, but I don't owe much. So as I grow older, I still need to grow up. As I approach the magic 50, I have nothing to lose, no time to waste and although I've given credit to God, I don't lean on him enough, I try to show him I can do it alone. I need to be more appreciative by acting better. I love life, I love people, I have begun to appreciate my elders more and more. I can't help but see older women and think of my Mom. I look to tomorrow to try harder and do more. I hope whomever reads this, reflects and learns something to take with them. I love seeing goodness in others. I love nature more and seeing it less. So without pointing to a New Year's resolution already, I know what I have to do and I will do better. I will be better at those things I am weak in and I will remember that I can still have fun doing it. I have kind of had to learn that over again. Time is running and to take adavantage of it, I can only live it to it's fullest potential, if I approach it as such. Blessings for you and love, Mike

Jimmy get's his Doo.

(Photos courtesy of Buffettnews.com)

I've been a parrothead and Jimmy Buffett fan since I saw him in 1978 (see Oct. 14, 2005 blog). It has been said that an artist that lasts a long time, does his best work at the beginning and the end of his/her career. Well Jimmy is proving that again, with all his recent accolades. At almost 60 now, Jimmy has gone from driving a city of Mobile, Alabama work truck, with a clothes hanger keeping the hood from popping up, to being almost as rich as his namesake Uncle "Warren" (no relation to know of). What started this path, was up until 3 or 4 years ago, his 2 1/2 hits (Come Monday, Margaritaville + Cheeseburger in Paradise). Now he just looks crooked and it spits out millions of parrot caged lining dollars! Jimmy just recieived a new award, entering the Nashville Song Writer's Hall of Fame. He used to say something like this, "I've never won any awards for what I've written, but to be here with you (fans) is reward enough!" Well no more of that chum! (I meant in the literal fishfood sense)

He just put out an album "Take the Weather with You" (a great, mellow Crowded House song) and I think this is his best album since Off to See the Lizard! Yes, it is mellow, but that's my bag baby! I imagine listening to his song, Duke's on Sunday, watching 10 foot waves, and eating seafood on a rocky Hawaiian coast. Jimmy has another song, that brought back Sunday afternoons, listening to my Mama sing along with her old LP standards, Whoop De Doo, warms my ticker. So I suggest you all get on board, listen to it, and if you get the chance check out Jimmy's Havana Daydreamin' or A White Sport Coat and a Pink Crustacean or Livin' and Dying in 3/4 Time! To me they are classic Buffett. If you want to know more, post me a note here and I'll direct you to the music that's carried me for about 30 years. Phins up!

Note to Jimmy: "We Went to Paris..... and had to turn around real quicklike!" RunRummer

Green for Red

(photo courtesy of nba.com)

This year I've had some memorable icons pass in my life. As a child from Upton, Massachusetts, I listened to and watched Boston Celtics games. The Celtics of course were successful way before I was born but I thought because they won all the time, that was the way it was supposed to be. Yesterday was another proofing that my expectations and reality are two different things. The mastermind of the Celtics dynasty passed at 89 years old. Arnold "Red" Auerbach was a New England icon. Red helped the Boston organization to a record 16 NBA titles. Whoa is me though, since my oldest son's birth, they haven't won any. 1986 was the last title, and the Celtics haven't been the same, or even close to a championship team, since then. As Red's influence will continue in the world of basketball, I can't help but feel that without Boston Garden, the leaky parquet floor, the baseline trappings, the lights going off during games, the fog during a basketball game, we've lost a lot as Celtic fans. Today I wear green in honor of the Red that demonstrated success, in a man that didn't care that Bill Russell was black, in a man that until recently had won more basketball games than any other coach, and in a man that puffed on a big, fat stogey and looked great doing it! We all long for success in our lives, Red was one of us who will carry that success for all time! Thanks RED!

Suns Rise

I'm so sick of Charles Barkley and the rest of the NBA announcing team putting down the Phoenix Suns! All they have done, without there out of this world player, Amare Stoudamire, is have the 3rd best record in the Western conference, and win two best of seven series (one of them coming down from a 3 games -1 deficit) and have won game 1 against the "predicted" Western conference finalist, Dallas Mavericks. I know it is too early in the series to say Phoenix will win this one, but at least give them their props!!!!!!!! You bastards! Just because TNT didn't like a small guard being the NBA MVP (2 consecutive years), they don't think they can win. Oh yeah, who hit the 3 to go ahead with 8 seconds left? Hmmph! Grit and determination remind me of my Celtics pre-1987! You don't have to be big in the NBA to win, how about smart, ala Jordan, Johnson, Bird? All of them were under 6'9"! Not 7', or weighing 300 pounds! Nash took a team that lost two, let me repeat, three major parts, no wait 4, including Stoudamire, Kurt Thomas, Joe Johnson, and Quentin Richardson. They got Boris Diaw and Raja Bell, castoffs from other teams. How come now they are so good? They get layups, because of a little Canadian guy, who has balls as hard as hockey pucks! Even if the Suns lost this series, or next, they have shown determination beyond their abilities, and persevered through injury and cold shooting. when the Suns shoot 43%, they are always in the game, but they shoot better than that in their sleep! Since Sir Charles has left the NBA. all he does is dog the Suns. I think he doesn't want them to succeed where his teams failed. He should know, being the smallest, toughest rebound leader in the world! He should know how much harder it is for the little guy to make it, especially in a league that is built on giants. Wait until next year, when the Suns have Amare, and oh yeah Kurt Thomas! Defense, size, skill ....Wahoo! How will they be stopped then? We even get the poor Atlanta Hawks number 1 pick in the next two years too!

DaVinci De-Coder Ring

I remember when I was a kid and sent away for a Cap'n Crunch de-coder, man if I knew then that such deciphering could lead to such a controversial film, I wouldn't have focused on writing my sister codes about what was for lunch! I saw the DaVinci code and wanted to share my thoughts. First off it's a frickin story. People think because they see something or hear it, it has truth. The man who wrote it is a man! He has no insight into any other truths than you or I, only supposition and research and than embelishing on that, the possibility. I can see how the Catholic church wouldn't like this, but they have been corrupt enough without a story that includes them. I think the whole issue is not any different than watching "The National Treasure" with Nicholas Cage. I won't get into it's premise, because I liked the story and it kept me guessing. It is clever, but it won't change my faith or belief system. Churches may not like it because it may entice weak minded people to veer from their truths. Man can choose, good or evil, as I said in my earlier review of church, that church isn't about shiny objects, or standing, sitting, kneeling, etc... It is about practicing every thought to make good, honorable, honest and even right choices. It isn't about a shiny cathedral or awesome art work. Think how much churches have spent on structures and property that could solve some of the issues we pray about! Does God care about a shiny cross? He didn't when Moses' followers made that sacred golden cow. God, as I believe, wants us to practice what we preach. WE can talk about doing good, but we need to do it! The movie is one of the better one's I've seen lately in general. I think the fact people might choose to believe it as an awakening of truths, probably also believe in other bizarre philosophies. Maybe Bigfoot or Martians. I used to have an opinion about Jesus' "doubting Thomas", but now I think it makes sense, that all he wanted was to find out truths. Maybe that's what a lot of us are looking for... but then if we knew it all, life would not have it's value, we wouldn't need faith and that's what God + Jesus have asked of us. Faith is believing that not all power is seen. Life's journey is finding the right paths to take and correcting them when we go astray. As far as bloodlines, aren't we all originally from the same bloodlines? Something to ponder I guess!? Enjoy it for what it's worth, a good suspense movie, that may stimulate you to think and find your own answers. Thanks, Mike

Ringer is a Stinger in my ass!

Just watched the movie Ringer. It had a storyline of a guy trying to get money by competing against Special Olympians. Great premise... Not! First off, Special Olympics even endorsed this shit to make people feel "empathy" for it's participants. Bullshit! How much money did they get out of this? The Farrelly Brothers, who have some really funny movies, stepped off the moving bus on this one. They say in the "special" section that they wanted people to appreciate and respect people with disabilities. I'm not stupid! Secondly, most of the speaking parts were fricking bad actors! Not even Special Olympians. The Olympians in there are good in their roles, but I spotted the difference mostly right off. Another thing was how they portrayed people with disabilities. There were parts where a group of them acted mean spirited and some of their quips were plain dumb! There is a difference between having a mental disability and being plain dumb. Dumbness is laziness and an easy cop-out, much like ignorance! I really do believe this could have been better. Do not buy this! Watch Simon Birch or even I Am Sam, but this has two funny parts and that's it! And by the way "As Life Goes On" the TV show, just released in a box set, was ridiculous! Sure it had a high functioning person with Down's Syndrome, but the crap he dealt with and his responses are not typical. It bothers me because realism is truth and when he is saved by a wolf, that kicked it for me. That assumes the Wolf knew he needed help because he was disabled? Aaargh!! That never happens to many "normal" people. If a movie is made to promote a certain population than it shouldn't do so by exploiting it!

Mother's Day 2006

Happy Mother's Day!
I know most of us have had a good Mother's Day, but today was exceptionally hard for me. My Mom passed away two weeks ago and we will have a service for her in Phoenix on May 20th. It's not so hard knowing that my Mom is in a better place, it's knowing I can't hold her in this physical world. When last I saw her, in March, she really was hanging on to see us. From what I understand, she went to bed the next day and never got up. All I can think about is how peaceful she was. She was meek, humble and relaxed, which is totally contradictory to what we knew her to be. My mom's greatest strength was doing things on her own. I cannot remember a time when she wasn't fighting to survive. We never lacked for love and always knew where she stood. I miss hearing her loud laugh and her eyes would smile when her mouth did. I know that it will be okay through time, but I don't have to like it. I love my Mom and hope everyone cherishes their Mom, today and everyday! Love all ways, Mike